Some basic ideas about how to have “The Talk” are: However, there are two disadvantages to waiting a long time.

This is a list of Frequently Asked Questions designed to help you explore and understand a few of the thorny issues that can come up in relationships as a result of one or both partners having herpes.

The questions and answers below were chosen to give the reader an idea of how to understand the possibilities in each situation, how to find the answers you need, and how to proceed once you get your bearings.

If you still aren’t sure about your own situation, you may Ask the Doctor for a more personalised answer.

A: There are definitely steps you can take that will significantly reduce the risk of transmission.

It’s a good idea to weigh your partner’s feelings and the impact this will have on them too, as well as on you. You need to gauge how well you two are getting to know each other and how close you’re getting.

That can happen quickly or slowly, depending on how often you see each other and how personal other topics of conversation get between you.

You need to ask yourself what is making you hold back from telling your partner – if you don’t quite trust them, then maybe there are other issues in the relationship that are bothering you, not simply how they would respond to the knowledge that you have herpes.

However, both you and your partner should also be aware that there is no way to absolutely guarantee that transmission won’t take place (short of total abstinence from all sexual contact).

Here is a four-fold strategy that you can use that will definitely reduce the risk: A.